Would You Trust Your Heart to Them?

Spam Cans
I’ll Take Mine With A Bit of Salt

I’ve been researching some new topics for my WordPress class in Arlington and decided to focus on comment spam. I almost never look in my spam files (thank you, WordPress!) but a quick perusal has been amusing, to say the least. For example, I got a bunch of badly-written, congratulatory emails that all pointed back to a single dating website:

Your style is really unique in comparison to other people I have read stuff from.
I appreciate you for posting when you have the opportunity,
Guess I’ll just book mark this site.

Well, nice enough I suppose, for a site that links to other dating sites. I wonder what boiler room they’re all sitting in? Another lonely heart had this to say:

I am in fact grateful to the owner of this web site who has shared this fantastic piece of writing at
at this time.

And how long have you been learning English as a second language, dear? Still got those best dating sites, huh? You, realize, of course, that I’ve been married for 10 years? Of course you do! But this one spilled the beans on all of them:

Right here is the right webpage for anybody who wishes to find out about this topic.
You realize a whole lot its almost tough to argue with you
(not that I actually would want to�HaHa). You definitely put
a new spin on a subject which has been discussed for ages.
Wonderful stuff, just excellent!

Well, yes, I guess it is a “whole lot its almost tough to argue with you,” not that I have any idea what you’re talking about. Good luck with your dating site and I hope you don’t piss off any stalkers.

I have no idea what this one’s about. They must have used Google translate:

Hello, its fastidious article on the topic of media print, we all
be aware of media is a great source of data.

Um…yeah. The comment has a link to a YouTube video. I’m afraid to click on it. God knows what creepy thing might crawl into my computer from there. I don’t think it’s for a date. Ugh.

Now, listen: don’t any of you decide to try this remarkably ineffective way of selling something. If you do, I’ll come after you  myself and I don’t care where you live. It’s good for a laugh, though! Just remember: “be aware of media is a great source of data.”

7 thoughts on “Would You Trust Your Heart to Them?

  1. Nooooo! You need a different photo, I say. I say that Hormel Spam (“spicy ham”) is delicious, no matter what the potted meat haters say. But Internet spam, however, is another matter… why couldn’t they have called it cheez (as in Cheez-Whiz)? Heavily processed cheese is much more deserving of contempt…

      1. I admit that I was bored and I dearly love Spam, although I am far from being a native or a resident of Hawaii. Probably camping/Scouting has something to do with it.

    1. Oh, yes, it really is a riot! In fact, I read a few of the comments to my WordPress class and we all had a good laugh.

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